Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Save Me Now?

  1. #1
    Member Cr187's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Green Bay
    Posts
    47

    Default Save Me Now?

    Save Me Now?


    It's taking so long, I can't believe what I've done
    And this pathway is too far to run
    I take a wrong turn and I'm back at the start
    I'm shattered and broken at heart

    It's taking so long, where did I go wrong
    How can I keep going if you're pulling me down?
    Where's the power that would save my soul?
    The ability to run when there's no place to go?
    Who can save me now?

    I can hear the whispers in the darkness
    and I know what it is they say
    They tell me this is my punishment
    that not even God can keep at bay

    There's no word for the darkness
    No word for the fear\inside
    There's no atonment for the wrongness
    That I have lived with all my life

    It's taking so long, where did I go wrong
    How can I keep going if you're pulling me down?
    Where's the power that would save my soul?
    The ability to run when there's no place to go?
    Who can save me now?

  2. #2
    A Light in your Darkness Pamela's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    5,157

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Cr187 View Post
    Save Me Now?


    It's taking so long, I can't believe what I've done
    And this pathway is too far to run
    I take a wrong turn and I'm back at the start
    I'm shattered and broken at heart

    It's taking so long, where did I go wrong
    How can I keep going if you're pulling me down?
    Where's the power that would save my soul?
    The ability to run when there's no place to go?
    Who can save me now?

    I can hear the whispers in the darkness
    and I know what it is they say
    They tell me this is my punishment
    that not even God can keep at bay

    There's no word for the darkness
    No word for the fear\inside
    There's no atonment for the wrongness
    That I have lived with all my life

    It's taking so long, where did I go wrong
    How can I keep going if you're pulling me down?
    Where's the power that would save my soul?
    The ability to run when there's no place to go?
    Who can save me now?
    This was excellent with great syntax and emotion.
    The pain and confusion were well expressed,along with the sense of hopelessness.
    I suggest you gather a copy of your writings and publish them.
    You are talented and I would buy a poetry book from you.
    Just my opinion.


    A Light in your Darkness...always there...and burning!!

  3. #3
    Member Cr187's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Green Bay
    Posts
    47

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pamela View Post
    This was excellent with great syntax and emotion.
    The pain and confusion were well expressed,along with the sense of hopelessness.
    I suggest you gather a copy of your writings and publish them.
    You are talented and I would buy a poetry book from you.
    Just my opinion.

    *blushes* thanks. I might someday, when I get better at writing. Wow, I only waited like four months to reply, sorry. =]

  4. #4
    ***** Elder KazeCloud's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Stockton, California
    Posts
    1,008

    Default

    I am very on how many great writers are on Bzs. Speaking of writing. Was my last sentence correct? Is it great writers "are or Is". =/ I never understood. Explain please.

  5. #5
    Member Cr187's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Green Bay
    Posts
    47

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by KazeCloud View Post
    I am very on how many great writers are on Bzs. Speaking of writing. Was my last sentence correct? Is it great writers "are or Is". =/ I never understood. Explain please.

    You were correct with 'are' I believe, but don't count on that. Lol, I'm absolutely horrible at grammer and such. i'm glad I'm a good writer!

  6. #6
    Senior Member Ruin-Tumult's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Gallia County, Ohio
    Posts
    203

    Default

    yeah, your correct, trust me on this. If the subject is plural, then the prepositional phrase (or whatever) must also be plural. I almost failed english class because my sentences didn't match up correctly on my final paper.

    Quote Originally Posted by KazeCloud
    Barges in*
    Hey guys. I want to argue about falling off the face of the earth.

  7. #7
    A Light in your Darkness Pamela's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    5,157

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by KazeCloud View Post
    I am very on how many great writers are on Bzs. Speaking of writing. Was my last sentence correct? Is it great writers "are or Is". =/ I never understood. Explain please.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ruin-Tumult View Post
    yeah, your correct, trust me on this. If the subject is plural, then the prepositional phrase (or whatever) must also be plural. I almost failed english class because my sentences didn't match up correctly on my final paper.

    Off Topic:Let me preface this mini-sentence structuring class by saying this, I corresponded with my High School English teacher for over 10 years.Pamela is a brave soul indeed!

    Irregular Verbs

    Some verbs are Irregular . Here is the present tense of the irregular verb "be" :
    Singular
    First Person
    I l I am

    Adverbs
    Adverbs can also modify adjectives or other adverbs.
    Very(modifies) (active voice verb),modifies
    the state of being in the singular present tense.

    A better word to use after ,would have been "at" instead of "on" ,since the sentence is in the present tense written in first person.

    The usage of the word "are" is correct because the noun "writers" is plural,therefore the plural form of the word "is" (which happens to be "are") is the correct usage.

    On topic: I really do enjoy your poetry it is very moving.


    A Light in your Darkness...always there...and burning!!

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •